Pattern Work and Internal Family Systems

Ever think to yourself, hmm I’ve really been doing that a lot lately, or I’m starting to see a trend in the types of partners I attract, responses I have when I’m anxious, or times I reach for a glass wine?

You have likely been noticing patterns in your thinking, emotion based reactions or habits. And this is great. But it’s harder to know what to do with this information. That’s where I come in.

Pattern Work -

Pattern work, in terms of how I approach it, involves a combination of insight building, automatic response acknowledgement, acceptance + compassion, unlearning of old unhelpful habits and re-learning of new skills and beliefs better suited to your current capabilities, values and life wants or goals.

We get stuck in automatic, old ‘patterns’ that no longer serve us for many reasons. We are adaptive by nature, and are always growing and learning - but we are the most primed for new learning in childhood. This is when the foundation of a lot of our automatic or ‘unconscious’ beliefs and habits get imprinted in us. And if we don’t consciously update these beliefs and habits in adulthood, what this means is that we are being governed by and living from outdated assumptions and perspectives, someone else’s rules for living that are no longer and perhaps were never relevant or true for our unique life, and/or intergenerational trauma wounds and automatic protective mechanisms that get woven through families over time.

Pattern work involves identifying what unconscious habits and beliefs are governing your life through mindfulness, compassionate listening and narrative exploration, and then acknowledging the ways these patterns are keeping you stuck in the present. The next steps are identifying motivations to change, identifying and addressing blocks to change, and building an inventory of existing values and strengths to start to live more intentionally by.

I use a combination of trauma informed narrative work, DBT, CBT & ACT for core belief and automatic trigger identification, emotional response retraining and value commitment updating, as well as IFS (described more fully below) to help you contact secure self-attachment.

This therapeutic approach is best suited for individuals who are comfortable with self-reflection and insight development, and provides meaning treatment for anxiety, depression, substance misuse and trauma work.

Regardless of diagnosis (or not), anyone can benefit from getting clarity about why their life is happening the way it is, and being able to make more intentional choices for themselves every day.

Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) -

This is one of my favourite therapies to draw from and is an incredible tool if you are finding yourself stuck in your healing journey or pattern reworking!

IFS, developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, is an evidence based counselling approach for better understanding the roles you take on that influence your mental health, and the various internal parts of self that govern and influence our wellbeing, belief and habit systems. One of it’s most notable features is that it is non-pathologizing. What this means is that, even if you have a diagnosis, IFS doesn’t see your mental health struggles or symptom as a problem or flaw (this doesn’t mean your symptoms aren’t painful and worthy of healing and change!). I just means they aren’t something that ‘wrong with you.’ IFS instead considers your symptoms an adaptive response, designed to get you to pay attention to what’s not working, so that you can get support and heal your wounds.

The core goal of IFS is the development of secure self-attachment, and IFS considers this the foundation of all personal and relational health. Secure self-attachment means building a relationship with yourself based on trust and understanding and a genuine belief in your abilities + value, so that your core and authentic self is what is in charge of your life. This is vital for building secure self worth and esteem, and with this we are able to form and maintain healthier relationships and life plans.

IFS is intentionally strength based, and anti-oppression focused with evidenced success for treating trauma and past abuse, and the anxiety and depression that almost always result. It is also incredibly useful for helping with self-esteem concerns and balanced identity development, as well as providing tools for managing difficult inner experiences + navigating complex relationships.

It is particularly helpful for anyone who’s healing journey hasn’t been stalled or thwarted by self blame, criticism or a feeling that there’s just something wrong with them! IFS helps you realize that you are not to blame for your hurts and painful mental health symptoms, and gives you to tools to take practical possible steps to relearn what your symptoms mean, who you are apart from them, and what you can do to live your life from a place of self-appreciation and confidence.

Let’s chat further if these approaches seem right for you!